Ask Dr. Job’s chief contributor, Sandra Pesmen, is a member of the Chicago Journalism Hall of Fame and author of “DR. JOB’s Complete Career Guide.”

Winner of several journalism awards, Pesmen is a graduate of the University of Illinois Media College at Urbana, and is listed in several Who’s Who editions. She also has been Corporate Features Editor of Crain Communications Inc., founding Features Editor of Crain’s Chicago Business and a reporter/features writer for The Chicago Daily News.

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Changing Office Mates' Attitudes

Q. I'm so bored and disgusted by the management of this company. But I think I hide it really well and during meetings I keep my opinions to myself. Yet I detect a "distancing" from the others, and I wonder if somehow they know how I really feel about them. I'm really careful about what I say and how I say it.

Ans. That's just not enough. Although we don't always realize it, our body language may be sending a message that's entirely different from the one our lips are speaking." And if your words and your body language aren't saying the same thing, people get confused and put off," says Nicholas Boothman, author of "Convince Them in 90 Seconds" (Workman Publishing Co. Inc $12.95). He suggests that in order to get your words and body in synch: 1. Uncross your arms and legs; make eye contact, smile, lean forward-to show you're open for business; and 2. Point to your heart, showing you want to get to their hearts too.


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